More the Merrier: Growing Number of US Cities Recognize Polyamory
Berkeley and Oakland make five—with more probably coming soon
In April of this year, Oakland, California’s City Council, passed a law preventing discrimination based on family structure, including those engaged in consensual multi-partner relationships. A month later, Berkeley passed a similar law.
Speaking to Berkeleyside, Lily Lamboy, co-founder of the polyamory advocacy group, Modern Family Institute, said of the decision, “We see polyamory as one of many stigmatized forms of building relationship and family against the backdrop of a culture that really sets you up to ‘couple.'”
Led by Somerville
To date, Berkeley is the fifth US city to formally acknowledge polyamorous relationships; the first was Somerville in 2020, with Cambridge and Arlington, two other Massachusetts towns, doing the same shortly after that.
As we previously reported, Somerville’s decision stemmed largely from the local government’s desire to extend the same legal rights already provided to married couples to unmarried relationships during the COVID pandemic.
Lance Davis, the city’s Legislative Matters Committee chair, explained to MetroWest Daily News, “The first draft required domestic partners to notify the city of any change of address, which struck me as not in line with what married folks have to do, and required that they reside together, which again struck me as something I’m not required to do as a married person, so we got rid of those provisions.”
RECOMMENDED READ: What Marriage in the United States May Look Like in 2036
But as the City Council was poised to vote, another Councilor, J.T. Scott pulled Davis aside, “[He] reached out and said, ‘Why is this two?’ And I said, ‘I don’t have a good answer. I tripped over my words a bit, and played devil’s advocate, but I had no good reason. So, I pulled it out, went through quickly making whatever word changes necessary to make it not gendered or limited to two people.”
The result might very well be the beginning of a national movement to formally establish multi-partner relationships as socially legitimate and legally protected.
Letter of the law
Similar to ordinances passed by other cities, Berkeley made it illegal to discriminate not just based on a person’s race and gender but their relationships regarding their access to essential services, business, or housing.
While these new protections are good news for polyamorous families, they also extend to less formal arrangements as well, including single or asexual parents with a child or children, casual non-monogamous relationships, and others.
One of the bill’s initial sponsors, Councilmember Cecilia Lunaparra, addressed the Berkeley City Council after seeing it passed unanimously, saying: “As a queer person myself, I’m so happy to co-sponsor this and happy to celebrate love and commitment in all of its forms. This is a step towards making our city inclusive to non-nuclear and non-heteronormative relationships and families.”
Strength in numbers
Five US cities extending anti-discrimination protections to polyamorous relationships may not sound like a particularly impressive accomplishment—especially as the country could be decades or more away from the same consideration and support on a state or national level—but it does demonstrate the rise of multi- or single-partner relationships.
According to more than one scientific study, the US continues to have an ever-increasing interest in polyamorous relationships. Approximately 5% of the US population are already poly, and, as a 2023 YouGov survey indicated, one out of every five citizens said they’d probably be non-monogamous at various times during their lifetimes.
The same survey, as reported by Kentwired, posed the question, “Do you think polyamory will be legalized in the US in the next 50 years?”
Though 52% responded negatively, an eye-opening 18% were more optimistic—with the remaining 30% stating they were unsure.
All together now
If you’re still not convinced, it’s probably a matter of time before polyamory and other non-heteronormative social structures are granted the same rights as two-partner relationships. Don’t forget for a long time, it was illegal for mixed-race or same-sex couples to marry.
It may not come soon, but as the supportive, inclusive, and progressive people living in Somerville, Cambridge, Arlington, Berkeley, and Oakland have shown us, even the smallest steps can still move us in the right direction.
Image Sources: Depositphotos
