Loves Yet To Come: What Sologamist Divorcing Herself Says About What Tomorrow’s Relationships Might Be Like
Time to supplement long-antiquated traditions with imaginatively romantic alternatives?
Back in 2023, Suellen Carey, Brazillian-born media influencer made headlines by marrying herself in a London ceremony, only to garner further attention when, a year later, she publicly proclaimed that she had ended her relationship with herself.
“Even commitment to oneself can have its challenges,” she told the UK Mirror, “as dealing with the expectation of being perfect for yourself all the time.”
According to the same article, Carey came to her decision after ten therapy sessions were unable to save her sologamist relationship, saying, “I realised I was putting a lot of pressure on myself and that sometimes left me exhausted. I understood that even in a marriage with ourselves, it’s important to accept our imperfections.”
Now pronounce you
Carey’s nearly five hundred thousand Instagram followers seem to be taking her self-divorce well, with one of her posts about it receiving close to twelve thousand likes.
Expanding on her separation, Carey also told the Mirror, “I also understood that personal growth can lead us in different directions. I’ve decided that now is the time to open my heart to new possibilities, including the chance to find a partner.”
RECOMMENDED READ: Proposed Ohio Law Would Prohibit AI/Human Nuptials
Carey is far from the only sologamist. Linda Baker’s 1993 ceremony is credited as the first, although some say Sasha Cagen’s 2014 book, Quirkyalone: A Manifesto for Uncompromising Romantics, led to sologamy’s still somewhat limited popularity.
Similar to how Carey ended her relationship with herself in order to find a partner, Lynne Gollogly told The Sun her sologamist choice, inspired by an episode of Friends, was out of frustration, “I did get engaged once, when I was younger, but it was silly and nothing came of it. I think with these things I’d never say never–but I’m not going to hang around for much longer.”
Speak up now
While relatively rare, sologamy is far from the only marriage alternative to appear over the last few decades. Though not technically legal, a number of polycules–a term sometimes employed by those in polyamorous relationships–have also created their own bonding ceremonies.
One such example comes from wedding advisor Emma Thurgood, who reminds polyamory event planners that in an absence of tradition, members are free to do whatever they feel best expresses their mutual commitments, “My personal favorite is a handfasting ceremony, but things like a unity sand or glass, tree planting, anniversary box, or braiding of the cord (a Christian ritual) are all great options to incorporate into your commitment ceremony.”
Human/AI marriages have also gone from a few rare instances to where the Berkeley Technology Law Journal deems it necessary to view their legal ramifications, such as how “marital privilege allows spouses to refuse to testify against one another and to keep communications confidential. However, there are no legal protections in place for conversations with AI chatbots. This absence of legal safeguards and the competing desire for user privacy has manifested into legal disputes.”
Forever hold your peace
Saying “I do” to yourself, “we do” to your polycule, or “AI do” to a beloved chatbot is likely just the tip of the relationship commitment iceberg.
As the artificial intelligence industry was once, at best, a couple of companies’ low-interest sidelines, what Exploding Topics estimates next year will be worth a staggering $24.15 billion. It’s certain that we’ll see even more ways for people and the technologies they love to tie the knot.
Gazing further ahead, the merging of AI and advanced robotics might make artificial companion relationships increasingly less controversial, as, unlike disembodied software personalities, having a physical artificial companion could at least somewhat resemble a traditional wedding.
But why stop at one plus one equalling two? Polycule ceremonies are fine for human beings, so why not extend the privilege to every conceivable combination of artificial companion (or companions), persons (or people), and, of course, including any who want to marry themselves as well?
Faced with these ever-expanding options, which may force us to reevaluate what relationships are and can be, can traditional marriage cope, let alone survive?
Though, as the growing acceptance and legal recognition of same sex relationships has proved, marriage, like the rest of human society, can and must evolve–if anything, because love, no matter who or what it consensually involves, should always win out.
Image Sources: Depositphotos
