Researcher questions the lack of masculine visibility in the sextech sphere.

Over the last five years, the world of sextech has become an increasingly female-centric space. 

Even the SX Tech 2020 virtual conference held last November drew focus to the diverse array of female leaders, CEOs, and executives within the sextech space.

And rightly so. There have been phenomenal achievements for women by women in sex technology; femtech is a testament to this. 

It’s also true that much of the technology also has a focus on either female pleasure or health, such as the diversifying range of interactive Kegels, pelvic floor trainers, vibrators, fertility trackers, and natural contraception. 

Part of this diversity has also celebrated lifting the taboo around masturbation and sex toys in society. Many female sex toy companies capitalize on previous patriarchal oppression in society against females, particularly in sexual or domestic standpoints. 

Take British sex toy start-up Naked Grapefruit, for an example. 

The sexual wellness shop uses historical and social information to promote feminist and sex-positive values on social media. (Notably, its Instagram account was taken down for 24 hours following updates to the platform’s policies on sex-related content in December. Naked Grapefruit have suggested this is “censorship” of the female body and pleasure.) 

As such, Naked Grapefruit’s Instagram illustrates the misconceptions around masturbation, sex toys, and sexuality in order to communicate to its (mainly) female-identifying audience. Many other female-based sextech startups have a similar narrative, albeit more toned down. 

While it’s brilliant to see so many sextech and sex toy companies bringing the conversation forward via the power of the Internet, less can be said for discussion on other sex toys. 

What about male sextech?

As a sextech researcher, it has become apparent that the conversation around male sex toys, and particularly male sex technology, is particularly lacking within the mainstream. 

On one hand, we are starting to see female pleasure breakthroughs via influencers and celebrities like Lily Allen and Cara Delvigne who recently signed with female-led sextech giants Womanizer and Lora DiCarlo, respectively. 

On the other hand, I cannot help but notice the lack of masculine or male visibility in the sextech sphere. Where are all the male influencers for male sextech? 

I spoke with some sex therapists and psychologists about the conversations surrounding sex toys.

I asked Marianne Brandon, a psychologist and sex therapist currently based in Florida, why there might be less conversation around male sex toys.

She suggested that because men generally start masturbating before women, there is often more shame associated with masturbation. This may have impacted the fluidity of the wider discussion around male sex toys.

On the other hand, she also noted that because men start masturbating earlier, their hand often feels more familiar, and there is less desire to remove that and replace it with a toy.

After speaking with a few sex therapists, it seemed evident to me that the reason sex toys were ebbing into the mainstream for “females” was that they were being viewed as accessories and supplements to their masturbation or sex lives. Male sex toys were too often being confused as “replacements” for sex. 

But, women have also faced significant shame and stigma around their sexuality and masturbation, and these conversations still manage to filter through. What’s so different about male sex toys? How come we don’t talk about them as much? 

It seems that the conversations around male sex toys have not yet gone mainstream, despite the numerous benefits that using sex toys regularly can bring to anyone. They are tools to explore your bodies, and sextech could provide some interesting wellness solutions for men. 

But there needs to be a conversation.

Expanding the discussion

Many great products are available for now, from companies such as KIIROO, Hot Octopuss, OhMiBod, and Womanizer to name a few.

While there are some companies that have developed a more diverse range for penis-owners like KIIROO, we are not seeing the same community that we do in femtech. 

Many aspects of femtech are definitely beneficial to everyone in society. For example, fertility tracking and natural contraception apps will be useful to both parties in a relationship. There seems to be a wave of events that celebrate this, but again, rarely for men.

One place you can find a faint chatter about male sex toys is Reddit, if you know where to find them that is. However, this conversation is nowhere near as mainstream as the female-centric sex toy and sextech companies.

While many female sex toy companies are household names, male sex toys seem significantly lacking.

The fact that the most anonymous social platform is the only one with a real discussion about sex toys might be concerning. Is it that people don’t want to talk about male sex toys?

Another issue is that female-based sex toys are often portrayed as empowering.

I fully believe that to be true; taking control of your sexuality and pleasure is one of the most powerful things you can do in this world. But we only ever really hear that from female companies. 

It seems unfair that there are so many ways for females to access sextech. There are events, workshops, and digital seminars. There have been a number of these throughout the various lockdowns this year. But not as nearly as many designed for those using male sex toys, or for people with a penis and/or identifying as a man. 

Sextech has also been a great way to amplify issues around female health. The future definitely looks bright. But we need to start talking about it more.

Image sources: Photo by Mike Dorner on Unsplash

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Human-based interactive pleasure doll offers two erotic companion services.

The Kokeshi love doll experience in Berlin appears on its way to becoming the first synthetic companion service to offer a “virtual girlfriend” experience.

What’s been key to creating the right sense of intimacy is the creative expertise invested in defining and shaping Kokeshi’s character by the project team: Alexis Smiley Smith, Phillip Fussenegger, and Sujmo.

While Kokeshi does not pose any animatronic or robotic capabilities, the interactive experience is delivered through human-interaction and linking technology in her Berlin flat.

Clients have the choice between interaction with the voiceover played by a sex-positive woman, or to spend time with Kokeshi as the love doll. 

The “virtual” human voiceover that interacts with the clients adds a uniquely human perspective to the experience. It also gives people a chance to spend time with Kokeshi, who are currently unable to travel to her apartment. 

The added girlfriend experience also allows for the addition of erotic pictures, a daily text chat, sexy content such as videos and images, personalized pictures, and one “long” conversation with Kokeshi.

Some of the services certainly emulate the physical or sexual contact that occurs between partners, girlfriends, or sex workers. 

Alexis Smiley Smith notes that the intention for Kokeshi has never been to replace physical or emotional connections in real life, or experiences people may seek with sex workers.

However, there are many people unable or uncomfortable seeking real-life intimacy, especially in this current climate.

She notes: 

We would never see Kokeshi as a replacement for sex work. We are trying to create an adult playground that utilizes all these different forms of technology, whether it’s interactive sex toys, virtual reality, sex dolls, or in the future, robots.”

According to some commentators on sex robots, like Dr. Kate Devlin, love dolls and sex robots can be seen as “extensions” of sex-technology. 

Much of the advancements around sex-technology have focused on expanding the growth and diversity of human sexuality. The Kokeshi experience allows users to play out fantasies or practice their communication in a sex-positive and judgment-free zone.

RELATED READ: Kokeshi, the ‘Analog AI’ Love Doll, Is Now Taking Bookings in Berlin

Hearts of humans

In acclaimed futurist Robert Yonck’s book Heart of the Machine, he comments on the use of technology as a “tool” throughout human history.

It can certainly be argued that many people are using sex dolls, and experiences like Kokeshi, as tools to explore, navigate or supplement their current sex lives. This is interesting when we look at the current global climate, which has seen self-isolation and quarantine becoming the norm in 2020.

As the website states, Kokeshi has “evolved to meet human needs in these times of self-isolation.”  

Another unique part of the girlfriend experience provided by Kokeshi, is that Kokeshi is always growing and “learning” through client interaction. One of the creators’ aims was that clients were able to learn and grow on a personal and sexual level through the experience, too. 

Kokeshi is a character that has been developed by artists. Through client interaction, Kokeshi’s character is developing and learning how to interact in new situations. This is an incredibly important part of human pleasure and sexuality.

As one of the creators, Alexis, notes: “We are always looking to try new things and to see how people react to her.”

Those who do opt for the girlfriend experience, receive a completely tailored and individualized experience crafted by the creators of Kokeshi themselves. Indeed, it is the voice of the creator who brings Kokeshi to life. 

If you have any questions about the girlfriend experience, drop Kokeshi an email at hi@kokeshi.ai  

Image sources: Kokeshi.ai

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‘Cybrothel’ creators plan to build the ultimate adult playground with synthetic lovers.

Seeking to enhance and revamp the world of love dolls, a group of artists in Berlin have launched the Kokeshi AI experience.

An hour with “Kokeshi,” a human-based interactive pleasure doll, starts at 80 euros.

“We can explore your wildest fantasies or a simple desire for intimacy,” explains Kokeshi’s chat box persona on the bookings website. But she assures us that in-person she speaks in real time.

“Come to Berlin where we can meet at my private flat for a delicious playful encounter.”

The team behind Kokeshi

Phillip Fussenegger, Alexis Smiley Smith, and Sujmo are the creative trio that has given life to the love doll Kokeshi.

Their combination of experiences and backgrounds in the creative sector and film industry has resulted in a unique addition to the current love doll sex market. 

Sex doll brothels are not uncommon in major European cities.

There have been a number of sex doll brothels and ventures across the continent, in Ireland, England, Holland, Paris, and Barcelona to name a few.

However, what sets the Kokeshi-experience apart from other sex doll brothels, is that it also merges human-interaction with the sex doll experience. 

To enable Kokeshi to “come to life,”  her flat is rigged out with visual, audio, and sound, so the creator can “talk” to the client as Kokeshi. The two-way sound feedback between Kokeshi’s voice and the client is also supported with the “voice” being able to see the room. 

Character development

Because the creators knew they had to embody and represent Kokeshi in the experience, they developed in-depth character profiles and a storyboard for her life. The character helps to provide a robust and compelling personality for the client to experience. 

Despite the fact that Kokeshi isn’t animatronic or robotic, the live human voiceover still creates a “human” experience alongside the doll.

As Alexis pointed out:

“We’re playing with that liminal space between an object… [Kokeshi] and then…subjectivity.” 

As such, the trio has coined the term “Analog AI” to describe their merge of human, technological, and doll. 

Interestingly, the Kokeshi experience will be able to add unique features to the love doll experience that have not been seen before.

The quality of interaction is obviously impeccable, in comparison to some previous examples of sex dolls and their functional capabilities.

Considering the speech and voice component of sex robots is limited right now, Kokeshi provides an interaction that is simply not yet possible with sex robots. 

For those who wish to visit Kokeshi, she is based at her flat in central Berlin.

The creators believed Berlin provided a perfect platform for the love doll experience, as it is a city known for its fluid, diverse, and liberal sexual attitude.

Kokeshi’s flat is fully functional; providing space for Kokeshi and clients to have space to explore and play. 

Adult playgrounds

There are two experiences that Kokeshi currently offers.

However, there are future plans for other sex dolls in the pipeline. Alexis Smiley Smith noted that a huge part of designing the sex dolls was developing the characters that they resembled.

In fact, this was more important than the physical aspects of the doll, which had to be able to cater to a wide variety of tastes. Kokeshi was not just a sex doll, she was born from a storyboard of creatives and artists.

Notably, she takes some inspiration from anime culture, particularly with the blue hair. 

Last week when I spoke with Alexis, one of the three Kokeshi creators, she suggested that the evolution of Kokeshi would also take place alongside the evolution of her space.

As such, the teams had big plans, like expanding the premises into a Cybrothel that incorporates sex-tech, sex dolls and virtual reality.

Alexis noted: “The ultimate goal is to build the ultimate adult-playground.”

Kokeshi has already proved there is a demand for these sorts of experiences. People are engaging with their future fantasies. 

Kokeshi is currently available for both virtual girlfriend experience bookings and bookings to her flat. For more information about Kokeshi, check out her website and keep an eye out for FunFairFilms, too.

Image sources: Kokeshi.ai

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The first round of products from startup Handi set to be released to testers in 2021.

One of the world’s first commercial sex toys designed specifically for and by people with limited hand mobility is about to hit the market. It was developed by Andrew Gurza, a 36-year-old podcaster with cerebral palsy.

Gurza and his sister Heather Morrison are co-creators of the sexual wellness brand Handi, which recently launched a website and promo merch. Handi aims to release the first prototype of its accessible sex toy to community testers in early 2021 and begin selling it to the public later in the year. 

One unique aspect of this toy is that Gurza has personally been involved in the design process, and the research and development process has involved participants living with a range of disabilities. 

Gurza is a well-known disability awareness consultant, advocate, influencer, and social media personality. He is currently based in Toronto, Canada. 

He has over 14,000 followers on Instagram and comments on many social issues online, predominantly those to do with disability or sexuality.

In fact, much of his social media success is from his popular podcast Disability After Dark, which has been a huge success since it launched in 2016. 

Over the years, Gurza has sought to address the sexuality of disabled people in a raw and unapologetic manner. 

He has publicized insights from his own lived experiences, while also providing a platform for other sexual-rights based issues or “intersections.” 

By bringing disabled people to the discussion about sex, and making his own views, opinions, and experiences visible, he is showing society how we need to listen to more like him. Handi is very much a product of Andrew’s numerous works over the years.

A ‘Handi’ sexual aid and guide book

Design and development of the Handi sexual aid was completed with a number of experts in a range of fields from occupational therapy, psychotherapy, or engineering. According to the website:

“We’ve  brought together an amazing team of occupational therapists product engineers and industrial designers, including Dr. Judith Glover, the only person in the world with a Ph.D. in sex toy design, and of course, the disabled community.” 

This comes as no surprise if you have ever listened to Gurza’s podcasts, speeches, or social media Tweets. He is a firm believer in empowering the disabled community to reclaim their sexuality. 

If sex toys are the tool that is necessary to do that, then they need a seat at the table when those toys are being made. As such, a percentage of profits from Handi will go towards disability development and design projects. This ensures that projects like Handi and other disability-focused design ventures can continue.

Recently, Handi launched their book The Handi Book of Love, Lust & Disability. It is currently available as an E-book for $15 with limited physical copies for a slightly higher price tag.

Not only has Gurza pioneered disability activism and rights through the medium of technology, but he is now also using technology to help evolve the narrative he is part of.

Image sources: Handi

The post ‘Disability After Dark’ Podcaster Launches Accessible Sex Toy Brand appeared first on Future of Sex.

Offering adult services online isn’t an option for many escorts.

There isn’t a business on the planet that wasn’t shaken by the onset of the COVID-19 pandemic.

While some industries have been hit worse than others, there are some more contact-oriented occupations in the adult world that people are not speaking much about.

One of them is sex work. And despite media headlines on the surging popularity of adult model subscription sites like OnlyFans, earning a living in the online world does not work for everyone.

Strippers can still capitalize on the ‘look but don’t touch’ mantra so synonymous with stripping when they make content. Sex workers like me don’t have that luxury; we need to touch.

That’s what one sex worker told me earlier this month during my research on how the restrictions were impacting the adult industry in Liverpool and Manchester.

Prior to this, I have had experience researching the UK sex industry during my Master of Research program at the University of Liverpool.

My research has given me a firm knowledge of the pre-COVID sex industry. I was intrigued to learn how this may have changed during the pandemic.

Sex workers are somewhat unable to social distance; the ability for people to transmit corona directly through sexual activity is also inescapable.

There is also the issue of sex work venues being closed down under the lockdown restrictions. Strippers, for example, have found themselves without “the club.”

Exodus to OnlyFans

As mentioned above, many strippers moved to OnlyFans. According to Forbes, between the months of March and April, OnlyFans reported a 75% increase in sign-ups.

But moving online is not feasible for all strippers.

Moreover, for some sex workers, content creation was a world too far apart from what they were accustomed to.

For many sex workers, the decision not to create content instead of sex work was not a refusal to “adapt” to the new system. Rather, it was a refusal to lose their anonymity in order to remain within the industry. As one sex worker told me:

The services I offer are not something I can transform into an ‘OnlyFans’ style service. I’m a mature escort and not many people know I do this job. I’m not ready to go public just to keep being a sex worker.

It is obvious that is nearly impossible to balance the impact of the Coronavirus alongside the occupational hazards of the sex industry.

Nevertheless, adapting should not mean forfeiting your anonymity or privacy.

Unlike sex workers, strippers found the clubs shut down and made all the decisions about restrictions for them. Albeit, they were on local and national government orders, but first and foremost their place of work was compromised.

Sex workers are finding the limitations a little different. Essentially it means we’re left to take the risks themselves.

I’ve got clients calling me all the time. It seems that they don’t care about the restrictions. But I have to take a different approach. Although, I’m worried if I keep saying no, they will go somewhere else.

I asked if the clients were as concerned about the restrictions as her.

It’s interesting because some of these clients work in the NHS, or have vulnerable partners, I’m well aware. But they are the ones putting me in this position by repeatedly asking. At the same time, I’m worried my work will dry up.

Similar reports from sources such as the Business Insider confirmed the sentiments of sex workers in my local area globally.

It seems that whilst technology has opened up avenues for content creation within pornography and webcamming workers, it has so far been unable to offer alternatives for more traditional forms of sex work, such as escorting or brothel work.

There have been some efforts from within the adult industry to curtail sex work amidst the COVID-19 restrictions. One of the most popular platforms to sell sex in the UK, Adultwork, imposed limitations on their platform at the onset of the pandemic.

Prospective clients and users are now unable to use the booking facility on that platform. Whilst users are free to make arrangements separately away from the platform, this means that dangerous clients are aware that workers are currently unable to leave reviews.

It worries me if I meet someone at the moment away from the platform. If something happened, I can’t tell anyone, because I was breaking the law to do it. It’s all a mess really.

The issue with selling sex on the Internet is that it is still politicized, despite the onset of technology.

The adult industry has been one of the first industries to ride the wave of technology, from pornography to Bluetooth sex toys, it’s ironic how many advancements we make in the bedroom.

However, it seems until society is ready to keep up, sex workers will suffer.

It goes without saying there are concerns when it comes to Corona, but policymakers are not listening to sex workers in the chaos. Until they do, they will be left to make desperate choices or someway find themselves in more desperate or terrifying situations.

Image source: ninachildish, Mario A. P.

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Getting to know Reddit’s kinky remote sex community. Part 2.

In my last article, I reported my findings on one of the largest subreddits dedicated to sex-tech on Reddit: r/Toycontrol.

I touched on how the r/ToyControl community had managed to grow away from the restaurants of conventional dating and romance into a more honest and open world. I also discussed how engaging I had found the conversation and members.

Alongside the meaningful connections that were being built, there was another element of the r/ToyControl subreddit that intrigued me.

READ PART 1: The Power of Letting Kinky Reddit Users Control Your Sex Toys

It was obvious that the BDSM scene was huge on the Reddit sub

In just one glance, it’s obvious that fantasies that revolved around submission, dominance, surprise, edging, and teasing were common on the sub.

All of this was made possible with the adoption of Bluetooth sex toys that can be controlled by anonymous users around the world. There were many ways that people exercised their fantasies through the subreddit.

Users combined a multitude of games, techniques, and sexual scenarios that advanced the remote connections between users.

Two of the users I chatted with engaged in regular remote BDSM sessions, which involved connecting to another user’s toy and controlling their ability to orgasm.

As one user put it:

I play with other users for hours and tease them into submission…Sometimes I make them complete tasks and games until I let them climax.

The BDSM gameplay was not restricted to a virtual world

Often, the idea of BDSM games would elapse into the user’s own physical life and routine. One user explained to me how wearable Bluetooth devices were used for virtual BDSM games.

Users would be given tasks in their normal day-to-day lives, such as food shopping, and were asked to wear their devices and allow remote user control.

So whilst you might be in the middle of the frozen aisle in Walmart, you could be having an orgasm controlled by a user on another continent.

Wearable vibrators such as those made by We-Vibe were popular for remote-gameplay, but there was a range of toys being adopted on the sub.

Users were quick to give recommendations, too.

Orgasm denial was another way of incorporating BDSM principles into remote connections

Male masturbators are commonly used, such as Onyxx+, to allow users to build up tension and sexual excitement.

The final result is an orgasm that you have been waiting for all day, totally controlled by someone else. This was part of the fun and how to build intensity and excitement within the gameplay.

When I asked users what their favorite thing was about remotely connecting their toys, I was met with a variation of answers.

The most common was the enjoyment and excitement that came with a remote connection. However, the users also commented on the ability for r/ToyControl to build meaningful relationships.

One of the appeals of remote connections was the ability to meet new people without shame, embarrassment ,or the usual complications that social discourse and interactions sometimes bring with them.

One user told me that these sorts of interactions were merely an extension of “sexting” or “phone sex”

It seemed natural to combine the world of anonymity and sex toys if users were able to cater to their sexual desires better. It was an outlet, a form of escapism from a world still so hung up on sexual norms.

Another alluring aspect about r/ToyControl was that it was a world dominated by, well, words

It’s overwhelmingly different from the looks-centric world of online dating that we have become accustomed to.

The same subjective judgments that we make on people’s physical appearance in our day-to-day lives are impossible on r/ToyControl

In a recent research report by PEW research, they reported many users found that relationships were more superficial than they were objective or real.

A relationship cemented on looks and appearance is an illusion at best; a nightmare at it’s worse. r/ToyControl didn’t have to worry about this toxicity.

It was obvious that this subreddit was a place where conventional norms were rejected and not enforced. It was a place where images of people were not central to a conversation or a connection.

As such, sexual preference seemed to be the bridge that connected people on the forum.

The only information users seemed to willingly give was their name, gender preference, and the type of remote control product they had. It was a breath of fresh air in comparison to the mobile dating apps, where we judge someone on a picture.

What became clear after only a few minutes of browsing, was this was an active community that did not need a pandemic to bring more people indoors to enjoy it.

Long before COVID-19 was a dreaded word that plagued our households and workplaces, Reddit was the place-to-be for Bluetooth-enabled sex toy users around the world. r/ToyControl is living proof.

Image source: M C, Khusen Rustamov

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