The only labels will be the ones we give ourselves

Over the years we’ve looked at where our sexual interest in the artificial—robots, dolls software, and the like—might lead in the very near future.

But any thought experiments about what might be coming to human sexuality has to delve into the human as well as the manufactured.

Because it is what we could become that could be truly remarkable, both in regards to erotic enjoyment but also in what it means to be human.

Beyond the binary

It looks like many are finally beginning to understand, and better yet, accept that our concepts of male and female are woefully inadequate—especially when it comes to sexuality.

Just look at the common triumvirate of heterosexual, homosexual, and bisexual. All of these are based pretty universally on the idea of a person being male or female. But, no doubt since that first hominid looked lustily at that first wheel, humanity has been more than one or the other.

With the advent of new surgical techniques, a better understanding of hormones, implantable devices, plus the growing acceptance of transgender individuals in many countries (with a few steps back in the United States), the concept of gender and arousal is being beautifully expanded.

RECOMMENDED READ: What Sci-Fi Got Right and Wrong About the Sexuality of Tomorrow—As It Is Today

It’s telling that the Merriam-Webster and Oxford English Dictionary has long included both the term cisgender (“being a person whose gender identity corresponds with the sex the person had or was identified as having at birth”) and genderqueer (“a person whose gender identity cannot be categorized as solely male or female”) in their recent updates.

While there is definitely room for improvement in general attitudes toward gender and sex, that the technological power of our information age is being used to share and educate about the options, and acceptance, of sex beyond male or female is thrilling.

Without a doubt, the future will see an erotic landscape full of new emotional and physical forms of gender and sexuality; a world of near-infinite possibilities for self-identification and, best of all, pleasure.

Any, all, or none of the above

With the acceptance of new forms of sexuality is also the arrival of the acceptance of having no sexual desire.

Gaining momentum is the concept of being asexual (“a person who does not experience sexual attraction”—using asexuality.org this time as Merriam-Webster seems out-of-touch on the subject).

“Unlike celibacy,” asexuality.org continues, “which is a choice, asexuality is a sexual orientation. Asexual people have the same emotional needs as everybody else and are just as capable of forming intimate relationships.”

In an interview with Ravishly, a woman named Sarah says about her asexuality:

I am not broken. I am not looking to be fixed. I am entitled to feel my emotions in my own varying levels, just as much as any other person. I understand I come across ‘prudish’ in behavior, but I am not holding anything back. I will happily answer questions but please do not go into a conversation determined to prove me wrong. I am an honest person who can only offer that which I have to give. I would never discredit another person’s sexual desire or disregard their emotions; I have always been baffled by other’s determination to do just that to me.

A free and open future

Much has been said, and written, about the how technology has changed humanity in some pretty staggering ways over the last few years. Digital publishing, virtual and augmented reality, “The Internet Of Things” and device interconnectivity, 3D printing… the list goes on and on.

The most profound change, however, is right in the often-used title for the years we are experiencing at this present moment: The Information Age.

While we have a long way to go, the power of the Internet to dissolve distance and bring people together is already transforming every aspect of our lives—especially in regards love and sexuality.

Beginning now, if we play our societal cards right, it could be the beginning of the end for loneliness, shame, guilt, and fear when it comes to what arouses and emotionally fulfills.

Or, to put it simply, we’ll hopefully have the power to look beyond ourselves and discover others for help—and for love.

Image Sources: Depositphotos

The post Be Who You Are: Tomorrow’s Spectrum of Gender Possibilities appeared first on Future of Sex.

Time to supplement long-antiquated traditions with imaginatively romantic alternatives?

Back in 2023, Suellen Carey, Brazillian-born media influencer made headlines by marrying herself in a London ceremony, only to garner further attention when, a year later, she publicly proclaimed that she had ended her relationship with herself.

“Even commitment to oneself can have its challenges,” she told the UK Mirror, “as dealing with the expectation of being perfect for yourself all the time.”

According to the same article, Carey came to her decision after ten therapy sessions were unable to save her sologamist relationship, saying, “I realised I was putting a lot of pressure on myself and that sometimes left me exhausted. I understood that even in a marriage with ourselves, it’s important to accept our imperfections.”

Now pronounce you

Carey’s nearly five hundred thousand Instagram followers seem to be taking her self-divorce well, with one of her posts about it receiving close to twelve thousand likes.

Expanding on her separation, Carey also told the Mirror, “I also understood that personal growth can lead us in different directions. I’ve decided that now is the time to open my heart to new possibilities, including the chance to find a partner.”

RECOMMENDED READ: Proposed Ohio Law Would Prohibit AI/Human Nuptials

Carey is far from the only sologamist. Linda Baker’s 1993 ceremony is credited as the first, although some say Sasha Cagen’s 2014 book, Quirkyalone: A Manifesto for Uncompromising Romantics, led to sologamy’s still somewhat limited popularity.

Similar to how Carey ended her relationship with herself in order to find a partner, Lynne Gollogly told The Sun her sologamist choice, inspired by an episode of Friends, was out of frustration, “I did get engaged once, when I was younger, but it was silly and nothing came of it. I think with these things I’d never say never–but I’m not going to hang around for much longer.”

Speak up now

While relatively rare, sologamy is far from the only marriage alternative to appear over the last few decades.  Though not technically legal, a number of polycules–a term sometimes employed by those in polyamorous relationships–have also created their own bonding ceremonies. 

One such example comes from wedding advisor Emma Thurgood, who reminds polyamory event planners that in an absence of tradition, members are free to do whatever they feel best expresses their mutual commitments, “My personal favorite is a handfasting ceremony, but things like a unity sand or glass, tree planting, anniversary box, or braiding of the cord (a Christian ritual) are all great options to incorporate into your commitment ceremony.”

Human/AI marriages have also gone from a few rare instances to where the Berkeley Technology Law Journal deems it necessary to view their legal ramifications, such as how “marital privilege allows spouses to refuse to testify against one another and to keep communications confidential. However, there are no legal protections in place for conversations with AI chatbots. This absence of legal safeguards and the competing desire for user privacy has manifested into legal disputes.”

Forever hold your peace

Saying “I do” to yourself, “we do” to your polycule, or “AI do” to a beloved chatbot is likely just the tip of the relationship commitment iceberg. 

As the artificial intelligence industry was once, at best, a couple of companies’ low-interest sidelines, what Exploding Topics estimates next year will be worth a staggering $24.15 billion. It’s certain that we’ll see even more ways for people and the technologies they love to tie the knot.

Gazing further ahead, the merging of AI and advanced robotics might make artificial companion relationships increasingly less controversial, as, unlike disembodied software personalities, having a physical artificial companion could at least somewhat resemble a traditional wedding.

But why stop at one plus one equalling two? Polycule ceremonies are fine for human beings, so why not extend the privilege to every conceivable combination of artificial companion (or companions), persons (or people), and, of course, including any who want to marry themselves as well?

Faced with these ever-expanding options, which may force us to reevaluate what relationships are and can be, can traditional marriage cope, let alone survive? 

Though, as the growing acceptance and legal recognition of same sex relationships has proved, marriage, like the rest of human society, can and must evolve–if anything, because love, no matter who or what it consensually involves, should always win out.

Image Sources: Depositphotos

The post Loves Yet To Come: What Sologamist Divorcing Herself Says About What Tomorrow’s Relationships Might Be Like appeared first on Future of Sex.

Some women have begun questioning the future of intimate heterosexual relationships

Is it too soon to tell if the recent interest in a South Korean feminist movement known as 4B will also result in a corresponding upswing in sex tech sales and AI boyfriends in other countries? 

The New York Times says, “Searches for ‘4B Movement’ in the United States spiked the day after the election, according to Google Trends. Dozens of videos on the topic have popped up on TikTok in the last 48 hours, with users sharing why they are for or against the movement’s gaining steam in the United States.” 

Among the dozens of TikTok users with 4B references in their user names or descriptions, one already has nineteen thousand followers and another, twelve thousand.

The 4B’s are South Korean words for dating, sex, marriage, and childbirth. In English it would be “DSMC,” sounding more like a pop group than an up and coming sociopolitical movement. 

Why US feminists are looking to South Korea’s 4B 

Joking aside, it could become a serious zeitgeist with roots in resistance and retaliation. Among heterosexual women in the US, attempts to de-center relationships with men have gained traction since the repeal of Roe v. Wade. 

As Jada Mevs, a woman quoted in the New York Times article, said, “What really drew me to participating in this movement was taking my body and my best interest into my hands.”

It’s all very Lysistrata of Aristophanes, but, if the situation continues, where might it lead ?

The personal is political

The Lysistrata was produced in Athens in 411 B.C, about a group of women who protest the Peloponnesian War by withholding sex. 

Thousands of years later, the 4B movement was formed by women protesting rampant sexism and discrimination in South Korea. 

Meanwhile, in the United States, women are growing concerned about what many feel is an all out war on women, with the starkest example the overturn of abortion rights and threats to birth control access. 

Additionally, the US gender gap may turn into a chasm. Misogynistic chants of “your body, my choice” sweeping the country after the recent election certainly don’t help. 

What’s to be done? Could technology somehow solve this thorny predicament? 

There may be a few possibilities, but they tend to appear like a departure from ideals held by our historic and current sex and pleasure positive revolutions. What could this mean for the future of sex?

The measure of a man?

The answer could be sex toys and AI boys. For people with female sexual reproductive organs, deciding to bypass sexual relations with cisgender men might invite a logical consideration of the merits of substitution. 

What’s wrong with recruiting an AI chatbot boyfriend (or two or more) for companionable conversations and sweet nothings—not to mention hot selfies on demand—and an array of enticing sex toys to simulate the physical part of the relationship? 

This strategy makes sense given the new hazards of diminished sexual and reproductive health care in the US. Childbirth has always been a dangerous business but modern medicine has made it less so. 

In other words, the emotional, sexual, physical and lifestyle choices that confront women in misogynistic cultures are calculations that do indeed take into account the measure of the men around them. 

Expanding sexual options

Masturbation, with or without sex tech, is an excellent sexual enjoyment though some people who would like to continue having intimate contact with a partner might opt to stick with “outercourse.” 

However given the current statistics regarding rape and sexual assault in the US, this could be a risky strategy if not already in an established relationship founded on trust. (And even that might not help.)

As for those sex toys we mentioned above, both partners can enjoy such things together. 

Expanding partner options

From the Kinsey Scale to the Klein Grid and beyond, research has shown the actual behavior of human beings is far more flexible than most people acknowledge.

Dr. Alfred Kinsey introduced his scale of sexual behavior and orientation in Sexual Behavior of the Human Male, published in 1948. His research demonstrated that many people had sexual experiences and desires that were not exclusively heterosexual (ranked zero) or exclusively homosexual (ranked six). 

The Klein Grid, created by Dr. Fritz Klein, was far more complex. Subsequent theories of sexual orientation and behavior are even more nuanced, acknowledging fluidity.

So it is not a stretch to suggest that in these post-Roe days, many heterosexual women may consider intimacy with partners who are not cisgender men or that heterosexual men who do not have female partners may choose to join the ranks of men who have sex with men but who do not identify as gay.

Permanent birth control

Another option for women concerned about unintended pregnancy or lack of access to birth control is to only date men who have gotten a vasectomy, assuming the surgery can be verified.

It’s worth noting that vasectomies are one hundred percent effective at preventing pregnancy and they are very low risk. According to the Mayo Clinic, they can be performed under local anesthetic as an outpatient procedure. Sometimes vasectomies can be reversed

For permanent birth control women may opt for hysterectomies or tubal ligations (“getting your tubes tied”), assuming they have the means and medical insurance to do so. 

Another option is a salpingectomy, which completely removes the fallopian tubes. This surgery can lower the risk of ovarian cancer. All these operations are more complex and potentially riskier than vasectomies.

Consent counts in a positive sexual future

As a new kind of sexual revolution emerges one essential ingredient must persist—consent to sexual activity, or not.

Education and discourse on consent, and the active use of consent communication in human relations, must be emphasized not only to push back against restrictive policies and attitudes, but to continue to work towards a better world: one where rights to bodily autonomy, physical pleasure, health care, and emotional fulfillment are respected, not criminalized.

Ultimately movements like 4B are about personal agency and choice, and consent is crucial to agency. The question is, can we pursue agency while retaining our juice and joy, even while faced with personal and political upheaval?

Image Sources: A.R. Marsh using Ideogram.ai.

The post 4B or Not 4B?—That Is the Question appeared first on Future of Sex.